SIGH

I just dont understand why its so hard for some people to talk when they are having problems. I dont really think its the quietness that bothers me so much as the moods that come along with it. They are really hard for me to deal with. The worst is when you know something is wrong and you cant get them to open up. So you set for hours wondering if you are the reason for the mood. All the time feeling crappier by the minute. Sometimes I feel that my love isnt strong enough to help him through whatevers bothering him. I know that lots of times I get very upset when I am told whats wrong, but thats me I am very emotional.

I would much rather know up front whats wrong, then to set alone wondering. I set worrying while he is sleeping and I know how tired he is so I dont bother him, but in the meantime I am going crazy. I have set for 3 hours tonight depressed and worried. I hate feeling this way. All I want is for us to be happy! To beable to confide in each other. I have my bad days just like everyone else does but I dont take it out on him. I go to him for comfort. We have been through so much to be together I hope we can be happy. After all we do have a beautiful baby boy to raise together. I want him to grow up seeing that we are happy and that we love each other very much. Well.....we talked but I dont feel like adding anything right now. Maybe I will feel up to it later.

I love you John!